(Written in response to a forum posting by an individual who felt “spiritually bankrupt”).
You are the door to all the teachings you seek! You have a lifetime of experiences and an inner compass that will guide you, if you would only trust its voice. If you seek a certain type of tradition or lineage, that’s fine, but it’s just as easy to get stuck in tradition and lineage as it is to get caught up in the quagmire of feeling lost. Find your own voice! It is connected with the Ancient Ones if you would free yourself to express.
Your sense of feeling “spiritually bankrupt” shows that your soul is calling you to go deep within, to follow the trail of tears to its Source. That is where, I believe, the Ancient Ones are calling you, and no amount of outward seeking will slake the thirst you have for Truth. Not at this point.
How to connect with your “Inner Shaman” or “Higher Self,” (whatever you want to call it)? What steps are needed in finding your voice? There are so many doorways (and you will find your own ways), but something that helps me is to “follow the trail of my deepest pain to its source,” and then hang out with it. For example, by just watching, dropping the thoughts for just a moment, and just feeling the pain (without the story around it), I can locate the emotional pain in a certain part of the body, usually near the heart. By just watching, without judging or thinking, the pain is just feeling, not much different than the feeling of joy or even bliss. In this way, you experience the fine line between joy and pain and realize there really is no line. The pain usually dissolves into tears!…accompanied by a feeling of great joy. I hope this is all making sense.
If I find it too difficult to get out of the mind (to stop thinking), I write questions to the pain with my dominant right hand, and then answer with my non-dominant left hand. I write without hesitation, without editing, just allowing the pain to express, even if it seems at first like gibberish. I write without mental editing. The idea is to quiet the linear, logical mind (connected with the left brain, dominant hand), by using the creative and intuitive mind (the right brain, non dominant hand) to answer and express. You will be amazed at what speaks! The letting go of energy to flow without stopping or mentally blocking allows the consciousness to go very deep, and it becomes like a meditation, a flow of awareness that draws you ever-deeper inside